Bladder Football

This is a game for one player, played for 24 hours a day. The rules are to stomp up and down on mummy's bladder until a) she swears at you; b) you make her go to the loo, even though she knows her bladder is empty as she emptied five minutes ago, for the 78th time today; and for bonus points c) catch a nerve so she jumps in surprise. Game is particularly a-foot (pardon the pun) when mum is walking down the street, or trying to have a nice lie down.

The game ends... well in about 4 1/2 months. Not available on any Sky Sports channel, and definately not Satanta.